Max
What’s up?
What day is it?
Have you skipped around again?
Yeah.
Yeah. It just keeps happening.
I don’t...
I don’t know how much longer I can hold on.
- Start again. Okay start again. I got one, I got one, I got one - I’m not really good at thinking about words.
I got one, I got one, I got one.
- Ready? - Okay.
- Three, two, one, penguin. - Pizza.
Oh, I really thought we had it.
Okay, umm.
Oh. Ah, ready.
Pizza, penguin. Okay.
Yeah.
Three, two, one
- Fish. - Pig.
Ah...ready.
Three, two, one
- Cow. - Dinner.
Ready.
Three, two, one
- Burgers. - Meat.
Okay. Ready.
Three, two, one
- Beef. - Pattie.
For fuck’s sake.
So I can’t open bananas lately.
What? Why?
They were like just a little too green
so I gave them a couple of days to ripen up
and then once they’re yellow they like just bend at the top like a dildo, and I’m like -
Why don’t you just cut it open with a knife?
Because all we have is butter knives.
I thought it was a new bit.
No, it's like an essential item. Cutlery, essential. Knives, essential. Oh my god.
Like running water. Or your fucking scented candle collection.
Besides, I do not know how to do bits.
I thought you might’ve been trying and I didn’t want to discourage you.
Thank you for the support.
You’re welcome.
- Oh, I read your new story by the way. - And?
It was very, umm...
How can I describe it? It was, umm...
You hated it.
No, no, I didn't. I actually loved it.
It was very you.
- I don't know what that means. - I just didn't quite understand it.
- Right. - At least you're writing again.
I told you, doing tandem stuff would help.
Where’s that painting you're working on?
Are you serious? I showed it to you last week
It was the triptych.
- You don’t remember. - I mean, yeah.
Yeah, I do. No, it was really good.
Thank you.
Have you ever won anything from one of those claw machines?
No, I’m pretty sure they are an Illuminati conspiracy.
I saw a guy installing one the other day and I asked him about it.
He just, like, shrugged all shifty.
Like, they actually put mirrors in there to mess with your depth perception
so you can’t actually win.
Yeah well
they wouldn’t want you to win or they wouldn’t make any money.
Hey, umm, about the water bill.
- I can pay you back once I get that thing - - It’s all good.
- sorted with the bank.
I got you covered.
Love you. Bye.
Max?
Ah...
Caroline. From uni. We went to R.M.I.T together.
We did all those mixers together in third year.
Oh, yeah. Caroline of course.
Oh, my God, it has been too long.
So long.
Oh my goodness.
How are you?
So amazing.
How about you?
Are you, are you still with Emma?
Are you still living in that place? What’s been happening?
Ah, no, and yep. Ah yeah. Umm...
What’s new with you?
Well I transitioned into youth work.
God, it is so fulfilling, Max.
Like, you wouldn't believe the satisfaction
you get from helping young kids find a way to better themselves.
Honestly, Max, you can see the change in their eyes.
It's incredible.
Oh, and I moved in with Archie.
Who is?
Oh, my partner.
For some reason, I imagined him to be a Jack Russell.
How was that...how was that that placement that you did.
Placement? Oh, the workshop.
That was years ago. That was...
Enlightening -
- And informative. - Oh, that’s great. That’s great. Yeah
- Yeah, that's really great. - Yeah. - Caroline?
Okay, well
I umm, I better run, but umm God, it’s just so good to see you again, Max.
Yeah you too.
Actually, you know what?
You should, you should come to one of our softball games, yeah.
We play Thursdays at Faulkner, and there's, like,
a whole bunch of friends from R.M.I.T
and I know they would totally love to see you again
It'll do you a world of good, Max.
- Caroline? - I guarantee it.
Bye, darling.
I wasn't angry at her.
It kind of sounds like you were.
More at what she inferred.
What? That she helps struggling youths?
No that like, I'm a struggling youth that needs helping.
Oh. I thought you were annoyed at the kids?
They can’t help it.
She’s just like...
Charitable?
She’s so -
- No - Friendly?
- Nice. She’s super, super nice. - Like, no. She’s -
She's so perfect.
Markets?
Hi, Maxine.
Or Max?
Which do you prefer?
Ah... Max or Maxine.
Max is fine. Whichever you prefer.
Okay.
Well, thanks for coming in.
Presley.
Excuse me?
My middle name...
is Presley.
Right. Well, you gave us some eye catching stuff in your portfolio.
- Great. - and we thought it'd be great
for you to come in for a little meet and greet.
A meet and greet?
Yeah, yeah.
You know, see what you're about, what gets you moving?
Where do you see yourself in five years.
You know, just keeping it casual.
Five years? Yeah.
We love
someone who can plan meticulously, but
who can also be extremely adaptable and just change direction on the fly.
Yeah. Yeah, sure.
Yeah, I can be two things at once.
Great.
So a little bit about yourself.
Oh, okay
umm, a little about me.
- Ahh... - What’s your brand?
My brand?
Yeah, the Max brand.
What is it?
So you didn't get the job?
I don't even know if there was a job.
- What did you apply for? - I have no idea.
Where did you get those?
In the precious few moments
I managed to steal away from you yesterday.
Hey I’m not that dependent.
You want a strawberry?
Absolutely.
- They’re good, huh? - Yeah.
I dusted them in PCP.
No. I'm kidding.
Oh, no.
You're dying.
Do you want to be buried or cremated?
Cremated, definitely.
Don't want to show up in twenty years as a zombie.
Promise to never get another best friend?
I'm not a widow.
Oh, you’re right.
You can do better.
No. It’d be really hard finding someone specifically
specific as you.
How’s your list going?
What list?
The ‘new you’ one.
Oh umm...
Yeah, umm...how’s that going?
I think it’s finished.
That’s like three in a month.
Yeah...
How do you do it?
Genius...
and Ritalin.
Can you catch this in your mouth?
- In your turtleneck. - Where’d it go?
But Laura we had an agreement
you said to the end of March.
Yeah, okay, sure. Umm...
You just need to give us enough time to find a place, yeah?
So you’ll let us know?
Yep, okay, sure.
Alright, yep.
Love to Mum.
Bye.
You know that abstract piece I was working on?
They’re all abstract, but yes.
I submitted it for an exhibition.
Why didn’t they just email you?
I don’t know.
Talk about destroying the environment.
Is this for real?
I think so.
That’s amazing.
- It’s amazing, right? - Yeah!
- You're amazing! - Yeah!
And there’s like
minimal cash involved, but that's okay.
We should go celebrate.
Absolutely not
we have rent due next week.
Are you kidding? When has that ever stopped us?
- I mean, multiple times. - We are celebrating.
- Oh no, please be careful! - We are celebrating!
Aww, yum!
Hey! Give it a minute.
Okay.
You writing something?
No, I'm making waffles.
I thought you were on your version of a roll.
You mean falling down a mountainside
hitting every single jagged rock in the way?
Yes.
Those look tasty.
I'm really hungry.
Can I have one?
Oh, please!
Okay! I’ll make you a plate.
Thank you!
- Hey! - Sorry!
Oh boy...
What?
I think Jordan's moved back.
Like here?
Like here.
How do you know?
The joys of social media?
Can I see?
I...
I don't think that's a good idea.
What, why not?
I just.. Max, I don't. I don't think, you should.
No!
Come on, man!
No, Max!
Yes.
Special edition?
Aren’t they all gonna be special editions?
Hey, Sumit.
Oh, it's just my two favorite loiterers.
- Aww, we’re their favourite. - Aww, hiya Sumit.
And by favourite, I just mean my only loiterers.
So just keep things to a dull roar.
- Of course. Anything for you. - Can do.
Max?
Jordan.
What are you doing?
Oh my god, so you moved down here right?
Yeah.
Any reason in particular?
Embezzled funds from...
an investment firm?
- What? - No, no, no
I’m getting it.
Umm...
Bank heist involving your desperate cousin?
No! I know!
You killed your ex-lover over a... parking permit.
I don’t know what that was. I have no idea!
I wish my life was that interesting. Oh my god.
Umm..
No, I...
I studied down here.
And, umm...
Change... I guess.
That’s a lazy answer. I don’t - I don’t know.
Emma came down with me.
Which really helped. Did I mention Emma?
Many times, yeah.
Ahh...
Ay, yoi, yoi.
What do you do?
Ah, I work in an architecture firm.
Ah, I’m a grad so there’s, like, so much work.
Umm...but it’s in the sustainability field
which is, like, where I want to be working.
so it’s really nice.
That sounds, like, so genuinely useful to society.
Why didn’t I think of something like that?
Are you into architecture?
No...
But!
When I was a kid
I thought there was only three jobs.
I thought there was like, what my mum did.
What my dad did.
And a mailman.
Okay, wow. What a very smart kid.
Right!
How easy would that life be.
I wish, honestly...
You’re just like Emma. Like I
still have trouble working out if I’m meant to pay at the table
or pay at the counter when I go somewhere
I’ve never been before.
You can just ask the staff.
No!
They give me this, like, pity look.
And it comes out weird. It’s like...
What?
Aside from that, what do you do?
Ahh...
I write.
I’m a writer.
I write sometimes.
I think about writing a lot.
- a lot. Yeah. - Oh you do?
Are you writing anything at the moment?
Umm...yeah
Tell me about it please...
- Ahh...okay. - I want to hear it.
Okay, so...
Ahh...
It...
It’s like set in the far, far future.
Like absurdly far.
And...humans are nomadic.
And, like, way down on the food chain.
And nature has reasserted herself. And knowledge has been, like, struck down.
And it’s...like...
It’s part of this story that I’ve had, like, crashing around my head for ages
and I just thought I’d, like, focus on this one part of it.
So it’s, like, an adventure story.
Where this young woman comes across this...
This ancient...like...being
that never dies.
But they’re, like, old. Like, ancient old.
And...they never age. They’re, like ageless.
Like, they look middle age.
- They’re like... - Okay.
Like Anne Hathaway vibes.
- Right. Gotcha, gotcha, yep. - They just never...
I dunno.
Umm...
So...that being is the only one that knows what came before.
And these two have to go on a quest to confront the sisters of fate
because they’ve been tearing apart the threads of reality
and then they have to try and...
like, save the ancient being’s friend who turns out to be, like...this...
human manifestation of death.
And there are wolves.
And the wolves become allies.
Wow! I would read the shit out of that.
Really?
Yes!
Okay well I’ll call you in ten years with the special edition release.
I would honestly love that.
- Oh. - Sorry.
I never do that.
- Sorry. - Do what?
Like, any of it.
Oh...
So...
We should, we should do this again?
Oh, absolutely.
- I mean, if... yeah. - No, I would love to.
- you wanted to. - No, honestly, I would.
I think it would be nice.
Yep.
Oh.
We hit knees.
Wow! I think you two are meant for each other.
I think we'll get married.
All right, don't get ahead of yourself, mate!
I want to take her last name.
What is it?
No Max
- you can’t take the last name if you don’t know what it is! - I don’t know!
- It could be something awful! - I don’t know what it is.
- Like...Smith! - But it won’t be.
It won’t be. Max Smith.
Come on. Yes, I love it.
I love it!
What - what note is it -
We kissed.
What?
You kissed?
Yeah!
Like on the -
How long was it for though?
Like...
Just good. I don't know!
What!
Oh my God!
Hello?
Hello?... yes...
Yeah...
Oh...
No, no, no... Yes... sorry...
Yes. Amazing.
When do I start?
Hey, Max, have you seen the -
I got some work.
- That's amazing. - Yeah.
- What is it?
Umm, like, admin work at some kind of
marketing agency.
I don’t...
That, that’s good.
- Yeah. - That’s great, right?
Yeah.
I’m still kinda dying inside.
How much longer are you gonna need those?
Oh...no...you can...yeah. It’s fine.
Don’t forget the thing starts at eight tonight.
Hey, just stop for a second I’m gonna call an Uber.
Max?
Do you want to keep walking?
I know tonight was a lot.
I really appreciate you coming, though.
I wouldn’t have missed it.
Had a bit of a cult vibe though. Didn’t it.
Super culty.
I am... I’m really proud of myself.
Yeah, I am too.
What?
Nothing.
What?
Nothing. It's okay. It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.
You don’t think I’m proud of you?
I didn't say that.
So, anyway,
your job here will be standard admin work.
Taking calls, minutes, filing, texting, messaging,
looking up memes on the internet.
You know, just circulating that around the office,
whatever you feel like.
Totally.
Yeah, I mean, I can... I can do that.
Well we’re glad to have you on board.
Thank you so much for the opportunity.
Just... That's the door.
I’ll... See ‘round the office.
Where is it?
Brunswick I think.
Yeah it’s Brunswick.
Brunswick is so far away.
It’s not that far. Hold on. Let me check.
It's across town.
You know how I feel about anything across town.
Who are these people?
It’s like Tash
and Paul and like a few other people from the gallery.
Did I meet them?
I think so? I dunno, there was a lot of people there.
There was way too many if you ask me.
It’s in Brunswick, I dunno...
I got work in the morning.
No you don’t.
Okay. No, no that’s ridiculous.
We are going out now, whether you like it or not.
Let me just see how we’re gonna get there.
Have you showered today?
Yes... Yes, I had a shower.
Okay...okay.
It's happening.
Let's go before I change my mind.
How are we getting there?
What?
Okay you’re stuck in an elevator
but, you can choose who you’re stuck with.
Who are you gonna pick?
How long are we stuck in there for?
Indefinitely.
Living or dead?
Both.
Real or fictional?
Real.
Can you change the course of history if you were with this person?
Yeah, definitely.
Easy.
Hitler.
What?
Why would you pick Hitler?
Maybe I could change his mind about the whole thing.
How would you do that?
I can just, like, think of something while we’re stuck in there.
Or, like, brutally dispose of him. Whichever one works.
Okay, so tonight we’re doing happy, positive vibes.
- not existential crises. - Totally.
Happy, positive
Okay.
Vibes.
What are you doing?
I'm stretching.
Why?
For are all the dancing we're going to do.
- You know, why aren’t you stretching? - What kind of dancing are you -
- I dunno. Like, maybe... - intending to do?
I just...
I’m gonna
- do Irish dancing. - Come on.
It’s definitely going to be Irish.
Yeah, no. These surge prices are fucked.
We should not have stopped and got that sausage roll.
They were like twenty bucks before. Now it’s, like, fifty-five.
Well you're the one who insisted on doing yet another Dolly Parton themed hen’s party.
Hey, those white women pay our rent,
and they don't even care about the fact
that I'm wearing a pink wig right now.
Don't you dare -
And this is why we don't eat in drag.
This is why we don’t eat in drag.
Okay...umm...
Lesbians.
- Hi... - Oh, my.
I was wondering if I could borrow a...
Oh, my God, I have so - wait one second.
I have so many. Umm...
Do you want...like...
Yep, yep.
Yep.
Do you want more?
No that’s good. Thank you so much.
Oh, my gosh.
Betti!
Yeah.
Hi.
I saw you last week, performing.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
You look - you look so familiar.
You know, sometimes I feel, like, I’m umm, like
this hamster on a wheel in this big capitalist thing.
- like - - Yeah -
We came from Brunswick, but then we were
really wanted to go to Yah Yah’s so we -
- came here. Yeah! - Oh, I love that.
We caught a bus!
- A bus? - Yeah!
- Oh, my God... - Who does that, right?
Yeah, right...
Because I would rather be out here living my full Bjork fantasy
in the biggest swan dress you could ever imagine.
But then you got to do these, like, dumb little hens parties dressed
as Dolly Parton.
What is the deal between you and soy latte...
extra from Neighbours here?
Are you dating, lovers, thieves?
We’re like, friends. We’re like, just best friends.
Your hair is...
It looks like - it feels like it would feel nice.
Yeah. It does
- Oh. no... - Can I...
- But we can appreciate it. - Sorry.
Yeah, we were gonna get a dog at one point
- A dog? - That was when we were together
but we’re not together anymore.
so we didn’t get a... dog.
But it’s good this way because now we’re just, like, best friends.
Do you know anybody?
Maybe a friend of yours runs a club.
Is the promoter looking for someone to fill a night?
Because I just lost mine.
And it's really difficult
- to pay rent! - No...
Aww... I absolutely do not.
I have a barista.
- A barista? - I have a barista
But...they...
Yeah... but I don’t know their name.
Do you know that this one...
If she could be stuck in an elevator with anyone.
She would pick Hitler?
Okay.
- Bye! - Bye...
- I love you. - Bye girls...
To the Uber!
To the Uber. Where is it?
Well, thank fuck that’s over.
Okay.
Arms up!
Here we go.
Two legs.
Okay.
Oh dear.
I thought we're gonna head in together.
Yeah, I know, I just need to stop by the studio first.
They're thinking of putting me up for my own exhibition.
How cool.
It's awesome.
Dude.
Come on.
I said it was awesome.
I should have had a package delivered for me.
Madeline.
Package?
It's Max.
Let me check...
Nothing's come through yet.
I got a confirmation.
Right.
So is it here?
I don't think so.
Can you like... check?
Hi, hi...
It’s all good.
I got caught up.
Have you seen her here before?
Ah... no. I think she must be new.
How’s the writing going?
It's not.
I feel like I've seen her here before.
Yeah like the last time you were here probably.
No, like, maybe in a different context.
You should go and talk to her.
What? No.
And get over a Jordan.
No... I’m over that whole thing.
So you're not still doing that thing where you hang out
at the place where you used to go with your ex
in the hopes that you maybe might bump into them?
No.
There's no law against it.
It's unhealthy.
Yeah, well, I'm just dealing with things in my way.
I think you might be in denial my friend.
I missed her.
Yeah I know.
Besides, I was like, a year ago.
That was three years ago.
Max.
Huh?
Do you have a favourite?
Ah...yeah.
Changes though...
Depending on my mood.
God this collection puts mine to shame.
I’m like embarrassed.
Yeah, I love it so -
Hey!
Max.
Huh?
I said, are you okay?
You did.
You disappeared there for a bit.
For fuck’s sake.
How did we get here?
What?
How did we - how did we get here?
What do you mean?
Max, we’ve been walking for twenty minutes.
Weren’t we just at the cafe?
That was last week.
Is that thing happening again?
That fellowship grant just knocked me back again.
Aww...
Max. I'm sorry.
That sucks.
I hate whoever got it.
No I don’t. I’m sure they have many great qualities.
It’s all political anyway.
Mhm.
I just...
think of myself as a failure every single day
and the only way for it get out of my head is by writing it down
but that just amplifies
- how fucked it is in here. It’s like - - Okay, okay, okay
Hey, hey, hey.
Look at me.
You’re not a failure.
And I need some help baking this cake.
So come with me.
Come on.
I’ve got a job for you.
This.
So... I'm just gonna put this out there.
And you don't have to say yes, but, you know, there's a Halloween party
happening, and I think it would be good for you
if you came with me.
What does that got to do with my crippling inferiority complex?
Umm... we can wear really funny and witty couple costumes.
And then when anyone comes up to us
and it's like, wow, that's so funny and so witty, who thought of that?
I'm going to say my friend Max.
Oh, they matched with me.
Oh...
Oh, it’s that person!
- No! - Yes!
No...
Just a smiley face.
Have you found anyone?
Nope.
I don’t want - I’m fine...
Can I pick someone for you?
Oh, please.
It'll be so fun.
We can pick someone for each other,
and then we can both set up double dates,
and we'll sit on opposite sides of the restaurant, and we can,
like, meet in the bathroom and talk shit... in the middle of the date.
Please, please.
Like, doesn't happen
- in real life. - Or we -
It could.
Taste for a taste?
Oh, yum.
Just sitting there in the gutter.
If any one of us is a gutter rat it is you, my friend.
With your other eye?
Hey! Don’t laugh at me!
You try it.
No, I know that I don’t
Do it...
Well, I really like the initiative.
Yeah, we’ll umm... definitely keep you in mind
if something comes up.
Right.
That's rough.
He did that to me when I first started too.
Kind of.
I mean, he took my ideas, but it was hard for me.
Sure, yeah.
So... a package?
What's in it?
What am I looking?
It is some of my beauty regime.
Can't you tell?
What's like your greatest fear?
Like, forgetting to lock the door
in a public toilet.
And... our imminent death.
Also, like, brain aneurysms
And umm... walking into the wrong movie theatre.
So those four.
But I think, mostly... death.
Why do you fear death?
Umm...
like...
laziness, mostly.
What do you do?
I'm a writer.
What have you written?
Umm... just like things here and there.
You know, you should totally chat to my buddy’s colleague Ryan.
Wait who’s your buddy?
- Yeah he’s over there - Have you been published? There’s this fellowship that you’d be perfect for!
Oh, I have, like so much on my
- plate right now. - Oh no, no, no, no, no this’ll -
Go check it.
Sure. Yeah. I mean, like, I, I would really love.
Do you have a card?
What - what are you writing!
It's all about connection.
We should collaborate.
What’s the highest bid now?
Thirty four hundred.
Oh my god!
Wow. Well, I'm backing you.
Not financially of course.
I don't have that kind of money.
Hey, Max, how's work been?
it's been the worst.
There's a guy there who I swear was, like, made in a lab to break me.
Like, he's the kind of guy, you know, just has an opinion on everything.
Oh, that he thinks is well informed.
Probably only listens to,
like, fusion, jazz, metal or something.
You’ve put a lot of this into this guy.
Yeah, he's the fucking worst.
Hey, how about you two put a lot of thought into your various life
inconveniences at the coffee shop next door?
I’m actually, like, really good here, thanks.
Oh and did you show your boss the writing samples?
Umm...
When is your next exhibition going to be?
Ah... probably beginning of next year.
I - it's good.
I need a bit more time. There's a lot of things to consider.
Yeah totally. How big is it going to be?
Immense. Like a blimp.
In a blimp!
Are you putting make-up on?
Where are you going?
Some place that apparently has really good duck.
Yeah... he’s been talking about this duck all week.
Where are you going?
Ah... we’re going to NGV. They’ve got the night time event thing on.
Dude that could have been so fun. We could have done, like, a double date.
Well, you’ve gotta let me know these things ahead of time
I can’t organise your whole schedule for you.
Cute.
What?
So, you going with the duck, yeah?
Umm...
It is the most amazing duck you'll ever have in your life.
It'll send you reeling.
Did I mention that I’m vegan though?
No. But that’s so cool!
Do you like...
how do you get your protein?
- is it a lot of beans, or... - Sorry, I...
It was actually...
it was... just a joke.
Umm...
It didn’t land.
That’s okay.
Hey, hey, hey! Ready to order?
Howdy. Yes, we...
Are we ready to order?
You know what you’re gonna get?
Yeah. Umm.
I will get this magical duck.
Oh, cool. Great decision.
Oh actually sorry
we’re completely out duck.
- Chicken? Filet Mignon? - That’s okay, can we ahh... yeah, no, no.
It's all right. Ah.
Could I just get five minutes?
Yeah, yeah. Sure, sure, sure, sure No worries.
Umm, how about some homemade foccacia to start you off with?
I really. I really just need five minutes, mate.
Thanks.
What should we get?
We don't have to share.
But I do like sharing.
I'm a bit like a -
- Are you gonna eat... off my plate? - Pick, picking kinda guy.
How about some kofta balls?
You know what Max?
I think I like this more than the duck.
Can you believe that?
Morocco.
- Have you been? - No.
Oh, my God, you have to go to Morocco.
It's just the most magical place in the world.
There’s, like this... there’s like an allure to it.
there's a there's a charm, like, it's from an old world but romanticised,
so to speak.
There's a melting pot of people and cultures
and things and places and like, it's dangerous.
But what's a little danger? Right?
Have you been?
Been where?
To Morocco.
No, I haven't, but I really want to go.
It's top three.
Top five places that I'd like to go in the world
Where else?
I want to go to the Galapagos Islands.
- Oh. - Ah.
See the turtles.
Tortoises.
- Ah... - They’re different.
Like, I would love to go to, Ibiza.
Ibiza, actually, you know, it's a ‘z’, but it's actually a ‘th’ sound.
Not many people know that.
But, umm... yeah. Ibiza, Mallorca, Barcelona.
You know, all these, like, beautiful, kind of Mediterranean countries
that, that like -
... can you believe that? Isn’t it just the craziest story ever?
So crazy.
You okay?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
You see another good looking man behind me?
No.
Listen, I know it's probably pretty early, but
would you be interested in going to see a movie tomorrow night?
Oh, dear god, no.
Sorry.
No, no. It’s fine.
I just kind of thought we were getting along.
I thought we were vibing.
- Yeah, totally. I’m... I’m just - Like vibing. On the same...
I'm, I'm like so... I'm so busy.
Like, I, I've got this thing, umm, tomorrow night, like, I.
Yeah, I'm just...
Okay, yeah.
- Sure. Fine. - No, like, you’re... you’re...
You're great.
Well, thank you.
Umm...
So you’re saying you wouldn’t go with Hitler?
No. He wouldn't be my top five.
Not even if you could take him out?
What is it with you and Hitler?
Phillip never called me back.
I thought you weren’t into it anyway?
He was a bit much.
He’s probably dead now.
Did you hear back from Ryleigh?
Do you mean Vanessa?
Yes?
Yeah I did, but...
I dunno.
I don’t think it’s gonna...
She was just...
She was really apologetic.
Ah.
- Like, for simply existing. - Yep.
Hot.
Oh shit, I am running so late.
I gotta go.
Where’re you going?
I have a dinner date.
With who?
Tash and Paul.
Good morning.
Hey. Happy birthday.
Happy birthday.
Come on get up.
I made you a cake.
Hey...
Gary!
What’s up?
I'm sorry to have to do this,
but we won't be able to keep you on from next week, Max.
Oh...
Okay.
I’m happy to give you a great reference.
Yeah... yeah... I mean... that would be...
great.
This act - This actually works out, like, really well for me
anyway. Like, with the timing.
- Oh does it? - Yeah...
- That’s great. - Yeah, yeah.
Gary.
We gotta go.
Gary!
Have you heard anything else from Laura?
Not yet.
It’ll be fine either way.
I mean, she's not going to turf us out.
I think.
I’m just not a fan of waiting around.
Yeah...
I mean, we could start looking for a new place.
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Do you feel like Thai?
- We could do Thai? - Dude, what’s with guys all dressing up the same when they go out?
I dunno, maybe it’s just a coincidence.
- Whatever’s fashionable at the time. - It’s not coincidence. They’re, like, not even vaguely similar.
They're, like, disturbingly the same.
Like they’ve all emerged from a fashion cloning facility in Uzbekistan.
Uzbekistan? Why Uzbekistan?
I dunno, I really want to go to Baku.
I don’t think that’s in Uzbekistan. It’s in...
... Azerbaijan.
What am I thinking?
Ahh... Tashkent.
What’s there?
Probably a lot of old Soviet Buildings.
- We could do Chinese? - Wait, haven't you been there?
To Tashkent?
- Yeah... - Max, you know I haven’t.
No, no, I mean, I mean Baku.
No, I haven't.
There’s another group!
You know what? We should
- ask them. - Max, I need food.
I’m gonna ask them.
Max!
I need dinner, please!
Can we just keep going?
I thought you had dinner before when you were with...
Tash and Amber and Paul.
I don't know an Amber.
Do I know an Amber?
I reckon we should go for a drink together next weekend.
What do you reckon?
Really?
Yeah.
They’re artists.
What does that mean?
I get antsy around them.
Why should you be antsy around them?
‘Cause they look at me weird.
You say that about everyone, including inanimate objects.
Yeah well that kettle had no right to look at me that way.
Stupid kettle.
I'm serious though.
Yeah okay.
Let's hang out.
It'll be fine.
Will it be fine?
I mean.
I miss hanging out.
Like, just the two of us.
What is this?
You know what I mean.
Oh, Paul is having a New Year's party at his place.
Do you want to come be my plus one?
Okay I’ll come.
Really?
What, should I?
- It better not be themed. - Yeah.
Yeah.
No, it's...
No, it's not themed.
How's it going?
I'm on a roll.
Terrified of stopping.
Where’re you going?
Uh... I got that work thing.
I forgot that was tonight.
I wish I had too...
Like, the only way to get ahead nowadays is to network your ass off.
I can come if you want?
Act as a buffer.
Not if... not if you’re on a roll.
This can wait.
It can’t.
Show me your favourite one.
Favourite? Are you crazy?
I can’t pick a favourite. That’s like...
insane.
But that one’s pretty good.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
Oh.
You gonna buy something?
Ah... probably not.
Because, you know, this is a business, not a library.
Aww, don’t limit your ambitions, Sumit. I learn so much in here.
Unless, of course, you guys are canvasing the store.
But you wouldn’t exactly be shooting for the stars now...
- We're actually canvasing the cafe next door. - robbing me.
- This is our home base. - This is just our lookout.
What? You guys are going to rob next door?
Yeah.
Do you even own a record player?
If you don’t want to go we don’t have to go.
It's not that I don't want to go.
You’ve met them before and it went fine. I mean
Tash said that you were really nice and she wouldn’t have said that if she didn’t think it.
Besides, you said you were gonna go
so it’s kinda written in blood now.
Oh... my mom said that to me when I was like, nine years old.
You’re always talking about doing something different.
No, I'm talking about the idea of doing something different.
This is something different.
They’re art people.
I’m art people.
No, you’re Emma.
What's the worst that can happen?
We'll get there and you'll get whisked away
by someone wearing way too many feathers.
And then I'm going to end up lurking in a corner,
just trying to act like I belong there.
And how is that different to any other party?
The methodology and the thought behind the
the derivation. Essentially.
Because what's happening is that when they are doing that,
they are drawing our eye away from what they're playing towards,
what they're not playing, which I think is a much more
powerful comment to...
- Yeah, yeah. - Without a doubt.
the way the world is working. I mean, you know...
That space where, you know, there wasn’t a
difference between, you know, time and, and place.
So I was just like, you know, why?
Why am I here?
It’s you, Max!
Oh my God.
Hi.
How are you?
Yeah. I'm good. How? Umm...
How’s everything with Emma?
I am so good.
Thank you. Thank you for asking.
It is the most present and fulfilling experience.
You are so lucky to have her.
Totally.
How...ahh...
- So... - Have you ever had a dream where you feel both life and death intertwined?
Boy, you’re jumping right in.
And you feel like sex encapsulates your entire being to overcome whatever the world throws at you?
Desperate to bring you down?
I had a dream like that recently.
Well, not a dream exactly, but an experience that was like a dream.
I could smell eucalyptus and mint like they were making love.
And I found myself within this tremendous spherical chamber,
like it was the earth at its most childlike state...
There you are.
I’ve been looking for you.
Thought you might be hiding somewhere.
Is everyone in there a type-A extrovert or something?
Well not you.
How you doing?
I don’t know how friendliness can be intimidating but that was... a lot.
They’re just being nice. Trying to make you feel welcome.
It’s a bit much for me.
I might head home.
No, don’t head home.
You and I can just hang.
No, it’s fine. I’m tired anyway and completely underprepared for this type of thing.
Max, it’s New Year’s Eve.
What does it matter? They’re your friends not mine.
What does that mean?
I dunno.
Nothing. I’m just gonna go.
Where are we?
I’ll come home with you.
No, it’s okay, really. I’m just tired, I swear.
Why is it so expensive?
- It’s like two suburbs over. - Don’t do this now, Max.
Yep.
There she goes again. Max, ruining everyone’s night.
Oh my god.
What?
I just can’t believe you’re making this night about yourself.
What do you want from me?
I don’t want anything from you.
Max, I’m the one that’s always here for you! So a little recognition would be nice.
Wow, okay. Yep. I’m gonna go because clearly I’m such a burden to you.
No, that’s not what I -
No.
- Really? - Yeah.
This is pointless.
What's going on with you?
Don't deflect. Talk to me.
- What? What do you want me to say? - I'm not an idiot.
I can see that something is up.
Okay? Just please talk to me.
What is wrong with you?
Nothing's wrong with me. I want to go.
Talk to me, Max!
- I have nothing to say to you! - Just be honest with me!
I’m fucking scared, okay!
I’m scared that everything I’ve done in my life has been a mistake and that I’ve wasted the past
decade chasing a fucking lie.
Nothing I’ve done has ever meant anything. Do you have any idea how that feels?
I can’t keep going back home knowing that everyone knows
how ashamed I am of failing. At everything.
And I hate meeting all these new people you keep introducing me to.
And I hate having to pretend that I’m a fucking artist.
I’m not an artist!
I’m not a writer! I haven’t written anything in months!
And I hate that you!
What about me?
You followed me here.
No I didn’t.
I just wanted to do one thing that made me feel like I was moving in the right direction.
Like I was capable of something. And you took that away from me.
Max, I have worked really hard this year
and every single time something good happens to me
- you act like I do it to spite you. - No I don’t.
Why can’t you just be happy for me!
Because you make me feel like a failure!
Flaunting your fucking success in my face all the time.
You love that I'm not going anywhere because it makes you feel better about yourself.
The only reason you're getting all this attention is because you make people think you want to fuck them.
I think you should go home, Max.
Sorry, am I making too much noise?
No! No, no, no. You’re fine.
Are you up to much this weekend?
Well, it’s only Tuesday, so...
Ah.
I haven’t talked to anyone in a while I...
forgot what day it was.
Maybe we’ll run into each other in some...
unplanned kind of way.
Not intentionally!
I mean, I wouldn’t stalk you...
I don’t know where you live.
I do know where you work, though so there’s that.
I’m not asking you out. That’s not me.
I’m not desperate.
Not that there’s anything wrong with you... You’re... I mean...
You’re great.
Hi, Laura.
How are you? It's Max.
I actually just...
locked myself out of the place.
My place. Your place.
Do you still have the spare key?
That would be so helpful.
Yeah. No, I'll just go for a walk.
And, I'm so sorry.
Oh, my God!
Max!
What?
- Embrace Max, embrace. - No, no not now, I'm sorry. I just can't.
- Oh, you just need to be loved. - No. I'm good. Thanks.
No you're not.
Yeah. Stop.
- It's for your own good. - Stop chasing me!
Max!
- Max! I'm here. - Tash!
- Tash stop chasing me! - Max!
I have so much love here!
It’s so weird!
Just stop.
Just stop, Max, and breathe and let me in.
Don’t chase me!
- Who are you! - Let me...
Let me in.
Let somebody in. Max.
Max!
Caroline, hey.
- Hi, hi, hi, hi! - Hi
Happy New Year!
What?
How are you?
Good. Great. Yeah. You?
I am so fabulous.
Oh, this is Archie.
Archie, Max. Max, Archie.
Hey.
So, what's been going on?
Nothing, really.
Umm... I’m just... umm...
I don’t know. I'm not really recognizing entire weeks now.
Oh, my god.
That is classic Max. Did I tell you how hilarious she is?
What about you?
Oh, my God, we have had a whirlwind of a new year.
I mean, so many positive changes.
I mean, first I got promoted.
And umm... and now we're actually thinking of starting a family.
Together?
Sorry.
What are you up to tonight?
Oh, well, Archie's company is actually having a work function tonight.
What do you do?
Real estate.
Oh, I was actually telling Archie how amazing you are as a writer.
Really?
Are... are you okay Max? You look a little off.
I've actually got to...
I have this thing... and I’ve gotta...
Madeleine?
Where’s my package?
Whoa.
Max!
It’s me. It’s Phillip.
I gotta... the footy! But, umm...
Hey, I had a great time the other night.
- Duck. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah duck! Let's get duck soon.
Let’s get duck soon. I really enjoyed last night...
Hey, can I get another drink? Thanks.
Max?
Oh my god.
Wow!
- Sorry. - Hey.
It's... it’s so good to see you.
Same. You too.
Really though?
Umm...
I'm sorry I haven't called.
I... things have just been all over the place.
It’s okay.
Yeah, like
moving back has been a whole ordeal.
I'm staying with a friend in Elstenwick at the moment.
But I'm looking for places around here. I just forgot how expensive it is.
Do you want to get a drink?
Yeah.
They were so good about letting me have time off
so that I could come back.
And then when I did, they didn't have any work for me.
It's like the economy and everything.
And I did so much unpaid overtime work for them.
I just...
Anyway, I umm - let's talk about something else.
Oh my God, look at you! You’re all frazzled.
I feel like I need to document this moment.
Oh, it's only in temporary lapse.
Yeah, sure it is.
Oh. Where's Emma?
It's so rare to see you two not together.
Uh, away. Seeing family
I think. She's been kind of back and forth the last few months.
Some of her art got selected for a gallery, which is really cool.
Seems to be going really well.
And, how about you? What have you been up to?
Come on, tell me everything.
Yeah, ahh...
Umm...
Oh! How's that story?
- Which one? - The one with the wolves.
- You remember that? - Oh my god, how could I forget?
It had everything in it.
I suppose it's only been three years, so I should be more patient.
Yeah...
Probably should have finished it by now, though.
Do you remember Sofia, Matt and Amy?
I want to say yes?
Well, I went out one night and I posted this story -
No this was when I was in Paris, and Sophia texted me
saying we were there too... We actually ended up
going to Antigua for a few weeks, which is a whole different story,
But they all ended up getting together
which is crazy, because do you remember when they used to fight
like they were overly charged particles?
I don't understand any of this. But, like keep going. So...
Why did they get together if they hated each other?
Oh, I think that was just petty stuff.
Like that fire between them was, like, more passion than anything.
I actually got quite jealous. Not gonna lie.
I never run into people.
So this is weird.
Feels like an omen or something.
I ran into Caroline recently. Do you know Caroline?
And then tonight, there's this guy that I went on a date
with a while back who was just, like,
way too charismatic.
And then this guy I worked with. Jasper.
Jasper will haunt my dreams
until the end of time.
I always find it weird, like running into people I know out of context.
Like normal people
stay in touch with each other, right?
I feel like people remain in each other's spheres, at least
by association, because everyone's in the same groups.
But for me...
people kind of...
disappear.
And then I'm just left as, like an afterthought.
Not that I ever do anything about it.
Like, there's always this promise
that somehow things are going to work out.
I'm just, like,
waiting for that moment to arrive where things start to make sense.
And I know that I'm doing what I’m meant to be doing.
What does that even mean?
Like no one's meant to be doing anything.
There's no arbiter that designates purpose to an individual.
Maybe there is. I don’t know.
Really we're all just spinning.
Just as confused as everyone else about this entire, insignificant process.
Why do we torture ourselves so much?
I do what I do because I'm terrified that if I question
what I've been doing my entire life, the answer will crush me.
It’s so easy for people to see you just for what you do to get by.
Sooner or later that’s just how you start to see yourself.
Just another missed opportunity.
It's natural to have doubts or be -
Have you been listening to anything that I’ve said?
Always.
Thing is, do you ever listen to anything that you say?
You can't expect everyone to have the answers.
- We're not responsible for you. - I don’t.
You left me like I didn't matter.
So that’s what this is about.
No!
I can't deal with this right now.
Meaning me.
No... meaning, like, everything.
You were -
You are too much for me.
I knew it then and I just...
I didn’t want to be alone.
And, like.... here you are. This gloriously stunning ghost of all of my shortcomings
When we were together, I felt like we had a partnership.
Like I didn't just need you all the time.
Like I was okay.
And now...
I don't want that to be the peak of my existence.
I’m not some projection you can just lay your shit on.
I know.
Do you?
You, you okay? Max?
Probably not.
Okay.
No it’s fine.
I mean, it's not fine, but...
You know how it is.
How long have I been here?
A long, long time. Long time.
Sorry I can...
I can go.
No. It's fine.
You're like a repeat customer you know... who...
never really buys anything.
It would probably be nice if you did buy something
At some point.
Not today. It doesn’t have to be -
- Yeah. - today. Just some, some time.
I'll think about it.
Cool.
I have had a day.
Yeah, it’s been nebulous.
How do you deal with it?
I don’t mean me dude. I’m centred.
Okay Sumit, you’re not fooling anyone.
Sorry, I don't know why I just say stupid things all the time.
And generally just mess up every single moment.
Time never does us any favours. Doubly with the mistakes we make.
Saw that... on a t-shirt once.
Or was it a mug?
How long have you been holding on to that one?
Well how long are you going to wait for things to just happen to you?
Ouch.
Exactly.
What if I just keep making mistakes?
Well, dude... Life is a bunch of mistakes.
You know, some work out and some don’t.
Did you want this?
What, like this... specifically?
I don’t know.
Maybe?
You know, for ages I was in a bunch of different bands.
And they all just kept falling apart.
And at one point, I just had to be okay with... that.
But I knew that, like,
no matter what, like, somehow,
some way, music was always going to be a part of my life.
So I believe you shouldn’t let dreams and specifics just...
get in the way of what you want... you know?
The thing you love.
That is oddly helpful.
You sound like you feel bad for me. Or is that how you always talk?
Sorry, I just... the shit that comes out my mouth.
You know, I don’t think I've ever done anything I've really wanted to do.
That's depressing, dude.
But you’re not alone in that.
You know, even if you are, like, physically alone.
Max, are you upstairs?
Hi.
What day is it?
That thing with the time again?
It's been the worst this time.
How are you doing?
I’m not okay.
I haven't been
for a long time.
I know.
You hate me, don’t you?
No.
I'm sorry.
I’m sorry for everything I've put you through.
I’m sorry for who I am.
I’m sorry, Emma.
Hey...
It's okay.
Apology accepted.
I'm sorry too.
I feel like for the longest time, I just felt so out of place wherever I go.
What were you expecting?
Less crippling, existential dread and more freelance work?
At least finding the stupid starting line.
Look at you.
I ran into Jordan the other night.
And Caroline.
And that fucking duck guy.
That’s a lot of people in one night. Are you okay?
I never run into people, right?
Tash tried to assault me with love at some point.
How is Jordan?
She’s fine.
I dunno. It doesn't matter now.
Do you still...
No.
Good.
All right.
Do you want the good news or the bad news?
Bad.
We’re gonna have to find a new place.
I thought so.
We may have to go somewhere cheaper.
I was thinking maybe we could go to, like, Northcote, Preston?
Don’t we have to be legally married to live there?
Yeah that’s what I keep telling you.
I’m not ready for that kind of commitment.
- Yeah, but we can get matching mullets! - Not with you!
It'll be super cute.
It would be way too hot. No one could handle that.
I feel a bit better.
Really?
No, not really.
Well that’s the spirit.
I’m glad you’re home.
I am too.
Thanks.
Is the coffee okay?
Oh it’s... yeah it’s great. You're... you're an artist.
It's going to blast right through me, but.
I don't know why I said that.
Umm... what’re you up to Friday night?
Nothing, I don’t think.
Why?
Do you umm...
Do you, like, wanna... get a drink or something?
I know... that it’s a bit weird because we haven’t spoken much
but you make a lot of coffee for me so it’s gotta count for something, right?
I’ve kind of just started seeing someone.
- It’s... new. - My heart.
God!
No, of course. Umm...
Sorry, I... I shouldn’t have asked.
No.... no don't. It’s... flattering.
That came out wrong. Umm...
it's... refreshing?
That also sounds awful.
Okay. Umm...
No, it’s just.
I dunno, I haven’t heard someone ask a person out in real life in a really long time and...
- it’s nice. - Wow.
I will take that compliment from the ashes of this interaction.
I'm gonna to go.
- Yeah. - Yep.
I'm Max, by the way.
I know.
Ah.
Okay.
What’s your name?
Sammy.
Nice to meet you, Sammy.
Nice to meet you, too.
- I am gonna go. - Okay.
Bye.
Bye Max.
So what happened?
It’s fine.
You didn't lead with your abandonment issues, did you?
You remember those ads that used to be everywhere
that were, like - a moving tram is like a rhinoceros on a skateboard?
Yes. Are you - Oh, my God, I saw them all the time.
I think about that every time I see a tram.
Max!
- Emma! - Caroline! From R.M.I.T.
- How are you doing? - Hi!
Good to see you.
Oh, all the things.
- Love the specificity. - Love that for you.
Look, I've got to run, but, let's do softball season again, yeah?
And you can totally play. I mean, none of us are good.
I might come along.
- Awesome. - That’s so nice.
- Great! Bye. See ya! - Bye! It was so nice to see you!
She's not so bad, is she?
Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?
She’s alright. I dunno.
What were we talking about?
I dunno.
Ask me a question.